Defusing angry diatribes is a carefully acquired art. Mediators, mothers, teachers, and leaders of all descriptions must arm themselves with this skill in order to step among emotional landmines with common sense and safety. Regeneration -- of calm, order and organization, not to mention good feelings, occurs only with concentration and cooperation on the part of all concerned.
Quiet observance, coupled with aversion to rapid judgments, or simply listening with an open mind usually begins a process which evens the playing field for all participants, giving equal importance to those who have discovered that employing anger to gain a forum provides them a distinctly usable advantage.
Those who understand clearly that personal power cannot be usurped without mutual consent are fortunate; fear of losing ground or position motivates and propels even the most passive individual. Confidence can quickly be restored by kind attention . . . just listen for a time with real intent to understand the viewpoint of another.
In other words, lose any sense of self-importance long enough to become a working part of all that is taking place; resist randomly throwing judgments around until facts are presented and considered. Consideration of the ideas and opinions of others can never be overrated or used too often.
Tuesday, March 26, 2013
Tuesday, July 24, 2012
Disconnecting
Being alone is edifying to some, and uncomfortable for others. Solitude can be necessary for recharging psychic 'batteries' or may create feelings of deficiency. Bouncing ideas of self off another's presence does seem to create a certain dependency . . . who are we -- without someone else's opinion, need or judgment?
Silent connection with one's surroundings presents an alternative view of reality. The one created for us with help from families of origin, schoolmates, community members, even immediate families . . . lends us our identities and forms the image believed to be 'us' -- which when completely alone and disconnected from its origin may not, in essence, really exist.
Aligning the inner self with 'who' we are is divinely inspired . . . some achieve this readily, while many struggle with it endlessly throughout life. It is an inspiring journey; disquieting at times, always fascinating in its simplicity.
Silent connection with one's surroundings presents an alternative view of reality. The one created for us with help from families of origin, schoolmates, community members, even immediate families . . . lends us our identities and forms the image believed to be 'us' -- which when completely alone and disconnected from its origin may not, in essence, really exist.
Aligning the inner self with 'who' we are is divinely inspired . . . some achieve this readily, while many struggle with it endlessly throughout life. It is an inspiring journey; disquieting at times, always fascinating in its simplicity.
Saturday, June 23, 2012
Resist or Repair
Stress overcomes everyone occasionally. Resist climbing on someone else's back when it happens, more especially when that person is a lover, a friend, or a relative who had little or nothing to do with the stressor. It's tempting to transfer anxiety or bad feelings and may relieve some immediate pressure -- while having seriously hurtful impact on that other person. It is absolutely NOT worth it.
Just be alone with your urge to vent for a moment or two - take some time and consider the options you have -- take a walk, a quiet bath or quick shower; play some music you like, eat something delicious, make a cup of tea. None of those activities will necessitate trying to repair damaged feelings later.
Most volatile situations are subject to resolution . . . sit down and list one or two possible solutions. No problem improves in the midst of an angry tirade. Credibility is a key issue when we want to be taken seriously; projecting unreasoning anger will do away with this attribute quickly.
Just be alone with your urge to vent for a moment or two - take some time and consider the options you have -- take a walk, a quiet bath or quick shower; play some music you like, eat something delicious, make a cup of tea. None of those activities will necessitate trying to repair damaged feelings later.
Most volatile situations are subject to resolution . . . sit down and list one or two possible solutions. No problem improves in the midst of an angry tirade. Credibility is a key issue when we want to be taken seriously; projecting unreasoning anger will do away with this attribute quickly.
Friday, June 22, 2012
New Eyes
Step right into a new world . . . take a trip, learn a song, put your feet in the ocean and open your arms to a wide horizon. Listen to melodies you loved long ago; touch a new leaf, a silk garment, a baby's skin. Feel a warm breeze on your skin, close your eyes and believe everything, and nothing.
Walk a nature path and hear birds and droning insects; stand by a stream and feel the rhythm of the cascading water. This is nothing humans have created. You are on hallowed ground, honor that. Stones, leaves, thickets, majestic trees, lithe saplings bending in the wind. Colors in pure form, noncontrived movement.
Look skyward and know that the air which sustains your life is part of the ultimate plan; the waters we so freely use are earth's lifeblood. This is a joint effort, friends . . . respect its survival, yours does and will depend on this.
Walk a nature path and hear birds and droning insects; stand by a stream and feel the rhythm of the cascading water. This is nothing humans have created. You are on hallowed ground, honor that. Stones, leaves, thickets, majestic trees, lithe saplings bending in the wind. Colors in pure form, noncontrived movement.
Look skyward and know that the air which sustains your life is part of the ultimate plan; the waters we so freely use are earth's lifeblood. This is a joint effort, friends . . . respect its survival, yours does and will depend on this.
Saturday, February 18, 2012
Stepping Out From A Front Row
A recent news story about Zelda Kaplan, who was 95 years old and still very much on the move . . . partying till the early hours, active in the fashion world, getting about the business of LIVING -- reverently observed her exit from our lives while sitting in the front row of a fashion show - quickly, dramatically and one would imagine very unexpectedly so far as she was concerned.
Her philosophy was simple - GO FOR IT. Just be happy and involved, do what you want, help others when you are able, and lighten up - sleep when you have to, eat, drink and be merry. You will be just as absent when it is over as if you enjoyed it, anyway.
Go - Zelda, no doubt you are still zazzing around wherever you have landed, and good for that. Now, for all the rest of us.
Her philosophy was simple - GO FOR IT. Just be happy and involved, do what you want, help others when you are able, and lighten up - sleep when you have to, eat, drink and be merry. You will be just as absent when it is over as if you enjoyed it, anyway.
Go - Zelda, no doubt you are still zazzing around wherever you have landed, and good for that. Now, for all the rest of us.
Tuesday, January 3, 2012
Intensity
A driving, relentless force - human intensity. Leading a fearless march into any fray . . . creating many upheavals, stealing peace.
With the 'chattering mind' always in the forefront, lists and plans drawn up, illusions abound. Absent that largely imagined strong grip on controlling circumstances (and sometimes other people) situations may go haywire, not conform to the plan, what could happen?
Relax. Something WILL happen. Go with it, extend love and acceptance, see what occurs. The world will not end. Cooperate with the universal force, reality does not disintegrate . . . in fact, there is always, sans high intensity, a possibility of improvement.
With the 'chattering mind' always in the forefront, lists and plans drawn up, illusions abound. Absent that largely imagined strong grip on controlling circumstances (and sometimes other people) situations may go haywire, not conform to the plan, what could happen?
Relax. Something WILL happen. Go with it, extend love and acceptance, see what occurs. The world will not end. Cooperate with the universal force, reality does not disintegrate . . . in fact, there is always, sans high intensity, a possibility of improvement.
Sunday, January 1, 2012
Rip it Up
The old, that is . . . these lyrics from an old rock tune have it right. Divest, get rid of outmoded ideas, draft a new plan, go for it!
As in plowing, breaking ground for a garden, turning the soil to provide air and light -- provide a healthy environment in which to grow - a better self. Invest in the future! Create a new outlook.
Do something different, even zany, each day. Challenge habitual routine, inject fun and excitement, thoughtfully observe sameness, modify and morph.
Rewards and success inevitably follow . . . so go ahead, paint a HAPPY NEW YEAR with vivid, splendid colors . . . then dive in with delicious abandon!
As in plowing, breaking ground for a garden, turning the soil to provide air and light -- provide a healthy environment in which to grow - a better self. Invest in the future! Create a new outlook.
Do something different, even zany, each day. Challenge habitual routine, inject fun and excitement, thoughtfully observe sameness, modify and morph.
Rewards and success inevitably follow . . . so go ahead, paint a HAPPY NEW YEAR with vivid, splendid colors . . . then dive in with delicious abandon!
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